Do You Have a “Shame Room?”

Closet shame room

Do You Have a “Shame Room?”

Maybe a month or so ago, I showed my guest bedroom in total shambles as it is my cat’s absolute favorite place to hang out when it is messy. (It will never not crack me up how much my fancy cat loves a mess.) I usually keep the guest room pretty tidy but it was chaos that day. The glimpse of my less than perfect guest room provoked a handful of reader DM’s… how funny would it be to do a post about our “shame rooms.” Maybe that’s not the right word for it, but you know what I mean: the rooms of our homes that we don’t share with our friends, let alone social media!

The guest room actually isn’t even my shame room. It’s this closet. My current apartment has two really big closets. One is perfectly organized and holds all of my clothes. You are probably familiar with that one, as I show it frequently. The other one? Not so much. It’s become a landing pad for out-of-season clothes, giveaways, pet supplies, luggage… pretty much anything and everything. This week, one of my pre-move projects is to go through it all and get it organized.

The truth is, I will really miss this room. The new house is beautiful but it has very limited closet space. I am kind of nervous about where I will put all of the stuff I don’t regularly use. I guess we will see… it’s going to be interesting, that’s for sure!

Tell me about the places in your home you don’t share/let anyone see!

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14 Comments

  1. Katie:

    My new place has a small coat closet and one bigger closet. At the moment, both are shame rooms! Organizing feels like I’m playing tetris all day. It has caused me to streamline and donate, so not the worse thing! Good luck with the move!

    10.24.22 Reply
  2. Grace McCrocklin:

    So 1) yes, absolutely – also my guest room closet. The closet/shelving itself is a nonfunctional nightmare and it’s a giant catch-all. Current highlights include my grandmother’s heirloom jewelry, a Christmas tree, and a full on door. Like, hinges and all, in the middle of the closet… (insert melting face emoji)

    But 2) can we rename it? What about a “I’m consciously trying to work on my consumption but without a full-time assistant and/or childcare provider and/or body double, I haven’t gotten there yet” room? I certainly don’t love that it sits there in disarray either, and I can’t imagine what I would think about it if I was posting a large chunk of my life on social media as my job, but like…we’re humans! Sometimes we just haven’t gotten to it yet <3 Maybe it'll just be a secret room, like our secret meals (another amazing crowdsourced post of Grace's, highly recommend if you haven't read it yet!)

    10.24.22 Reply
  3. Maggie:

    Before I started working from home in March 2020 it was the room we referred to as the office, however it was just a dumping ground for everything that didn’t have a convenient place. Now that I’m actually using the office as intended it’s now the guest room, which unsurprisingly has only been used once since March 2020.

    10.24.22 Reply
  4. m.:

    I live in a cozy 1930s cottage with 3 tiny reach-in closets—one for me, one for my husband and one for our extra towels, coats, luggage. We have really learned to live with less because we love our house. I have a rule about accumulation. If one thing comes in (a new dress, a new book) something of equal mass needs to go to Goodwill. After watching our grandparents and parents really struggle to downsize from large homes full of stuff, this seems like a better way to live. As far as the “shame room” goes, I have a small office where I do zero work but it acts as a landing zone for unread books, packages to return, presents to wrap. My husband has a basement full of guitars, equipment and comic books. We don’t go into each other’s shame rooms out of respect. We also collectively agreed to store nothing in our large attic. I’m scared to go up there anyway. Our parents are constantly trying to give us the things they bought and have no room for and we tell them to sell it or give it away. Less stuff!

    10.24.22 Reply
  5. Cynthia:

    I call my shame closet the Mary Poppins closet. Honestly, anything and everything is in there.

    10.24.22 Reply
  6. Taylor:

    Bought a brand new townhouse a few months ago and I’ve kept it really clean except for….my office closet. I can’t tell you how many times things have come tumbling off of the shelves when I go to open it because I just toss stuff on top of whatever is there. It’s become a drop zone for things that don’t make sense in other areas of my house and I have no desire to organize it. I think in a way it allows me a little slice of messy amongst all the clean and since no one will ever see it, it doesn’t bother me.

    10.24.22 Reply
  7. Cathy:

    I don’t have a shame room, but we have a 1950’s house with pretty small closets. I have two hallway closets that make me feel like Monica from Friends. Every time I open one to get something out or put something in you must prepare for an avalanche of items to tumble out. I keep thinking I should hire a closet specialist to redesign the shelving but I’m not sure that would actually help. Whenever my 88-year-old father-in-law comes over my husband has to head him off at the coat closet because he wants to hang his coat there! Absolutely not!

    10.24.22 Reply
  8. Rachel:

    This post made me LOL as I’m currently sitting in my “shame room” which is my office. I recently had an unexpected extended houseguest arrive and between that and a ton of recent travel, this is the room where I’m dumping things I don’t have time to deal with. It is my weekend project to go through all of this!

    10.24.22 Reply
  9. Brit:

    I moved from an apartment with tons of closest to 1920s townhouse last year. I’ve bought so much additional furniture for storage and the guest room is still a shame room. I’m currently switching out seasonal clothes and attempting to purge my closet, so it’s especially bad right now. Like Tyrion, my cat loves to nap on the bed when it’s covered in clothes.

    10.24.22 Reply
  10. Andrea:

    I agree another commenter that this needs a rebrand!

    I call it my mess room, if I am feeling not great about it at that moment, or my storage room, if I feel good about it that day.

    I have moved 8 times in 13 years. I have been a grad student, full-time employee, a grad student again, both and now just a full time employee during that timeframe. This has meant very different outfits and needed supplies. As I have oscillated between different stages and living circumstances, I haven’t wanted/needed to get rid of things bc I knew I would use them again. For example, I lived somewhere for just one year so I only unpacked one mug!

    Mine currently is a storage room and office bc my new place has only 2 closets, and I work from home two days a week.

    10.24.22 Reply
  11. Bex:

    I think I just have a shame townhouse ‍♀️

    10.24.22 Reply
    • Kimi, Cotton Cashmere Cat Hair:

      I relate to this. I also have a shame townhouse lol! I only share tidy corners of my home online, and always the same ones…the rest is forever a mess.

      11.2.22 Reply
  12. Hilliary:

    I cannot tell you how much better this makes me feel I was feeling like the inkjet person who can’t get this one took together. I recently moved from a 1 bedroom apartment with 3 walk in closets to a 2 bedroom 1920s bungalow with 2 small closets. I’m a fashion lover and cannot for the life of me deal with how to organize the second bedroom to nicely store all my shoes and accessories and make it as a working guest room. It’s definitely been on my list to things to tackle.

    10.24.22 Reply
  13. Darlene:

    Boy do I have a shame room and it is my craft room. i don’t know where to even start.

    HELP

    10.26.22 Reply